Connecting to relays automatically without me adding them manually. They may be ran by different operators but from a certain point of view this looks like well that's okay because their your trusted partners. Theres no policy for operators to have to uphold but yet you made it that people automatically connect to them & yet every relay has it's own ToS & PP. Who consents to every relays tos & pp without question?
Discussion
"Connecting automatically" is not centralization. Forcing two users to pick the same relay so that they can see each other is centralization. You are using the wrong word.
You don't cosent to any ToS when visiting a relay in the same way that you don't consent to any ToS by just visiting a website. You have to further, explicitly accept their ToS.
Outbox is how Nostr works. It has been written as a NIP for 2 years now. We were just very late on this feature. Most clients are already doing this for years.