Yea, I just read my own comment. I need to get a new digital keyboard. This damn thing autocorrects "nerd" to "need." Good god.
Discussion
If you don't value your privacy:
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.google.android.inputmethod.latin
If you do:
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.menny.android.anysoftkeyboard
Thanks, I'll take a look at these.