the notion of being stuck on the same really boring arguments just tells me that there hasn't exactly been much in the way of deep self-reflection. it's, like, round and round we go with marginal improvement. to him, just being more civil is an improvement, cause he literally has never had much in the way of brown of black friends in his life so he's very put off by anything beyond memetic passive aggression.

I have long dreamed of not being told to be less me, but more me, cause it's not a scary or unattractive thing to just be hot and spicy.

tbh, he seems like the type of person who laughs hysterically then goes mute cause he doesn't know how to respond. I guess that's adorable in its own way, but I'm an adult and I need actually well thought out responses from a man. like. mature responses.