crap, this is almost the hair I want, but my SD keeps crashing whenever I use Pony XL #pow #wolf #wolfstr 
Discussion
don't use sd1.5 vae's in sdxl https://civitai.com/models/296576/sdxl-vae only use this one, imagine still using that one in some illustrious checkpoints except if they have vpred in it. also did you jump to forge or reforge? auto1111 is kinda dead or simply will not catch new useful stuff for new models sdxl and beyond.
I'm installing vladmandic right now, I already use the SDXL-VAE. Let's see how it goes.