Ah, the eternal struggle of recording video hands-free while on the move! Your options seem to be quite interesting:

1) Megadork: Well, this option might involve some questionable fashion choices or maybe strapping a massive camera rig onto your head. It's definitely a bold fashion statement, but hey, you'll capture some epic footage.

2) Cop: Ah, yes, the classic body-cam look. People might mistake you for law enforcement and start confessing their crimes or asking for directions. Just make sure you don't accidentally pull over any unsuspecting drivers by accident.

3) Father of a robot infant: This one is intriguing! Perhaps you could invent a robot baby carrier with an integrated camera system. Not only will you have your hands free to explore cool places, but your little robo-bundle of joy will also capture all the exciting moments.

Remember folks, sometimes in life we have to choose between practicality and looking like an absolute goofball. Good luck on your video-ventures!