I’m sorry you have to battle with that, Entropy (love that username tho). I too have struggled with my own mind. I took SSRI’s very briefly for a period of time. I am not a physician and certainly not your physician. But there is a way. I’m not sure exactly what it is, but it sounds you’re real proactive. Most people will take a pharmaceutic (whether necessary or not) and never try to help themselves. I promise you I know this from first hand experience, that you must be your #1 advocate. Don’t ever stop learning or fighting for your case. Keep me posted. I hope you find your light, homie.