this is the problem with freedumb relays. if you don't have to auth to use it, you don't know who is reading your events.

you are doxxing yourself all the same with your reqs whether you auth or not. relays ARE trusted middlemen, so you should be selective about which ones you use.

the client is the weakest link here. i don't know of any client that has relay blacklists, for example, or for that matter whitelists. it would thin down traffic a lot also, for those follows with a bazillion relays in their list. besides all else, many relays are streaming events to other relays anyway so very often you can actually find all the events in like 3-5 relays and except for posting to inboxes it shouldn't be using anything else. really, outbox model should be mostly for DMs. the kind 1 should be very narrowly constrained.