Touch grass more like touch ants.
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I’ll never forget the first time I went down to Texas on business and found myself standing in our sales manager’s backyard in my bare feet on what looked like lush green beautiful lawn. My introduction to fire ants.
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I didn't know there weren't ants in grass in other places. Touch grass seems a lot less masochistic now.
There are magical places north of the 49th where you can walk by a wall in the summer that doesn’t have 100,000 flies on it even.