"Is there a newbie friendly home-spun relay option?"

I guess nostr-tray is a decent option for noobies but don't know how many clients support it. I got it running with noStrudel and it's fast af plus I have a copy of my events local.

As for de-platforming and crackdowns. It will be a lost war similar to the desire to control or regulate Bitcoin. The cat is out of the bag.