Nothing, as long as it’s still running. You can use bots and channel peers to keep an eye on your node’s status.

Whenever my node goes offline I get two automated alerts and like four human ones.

Ain’t that right, nostr:npub1zdvj0favucg4y4aer9njge5hu3a2rkgtktat0r0scvx8jpqrgn2ss2f5ng?

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Discussion

Going offline…does that cause a force close of channels and thereby cost you Sats?

No, going offline means the channels are unavailable, but they can be kept in that state for a fairly long time. The other peer could choose to close the channel to get their sats back.