literally always date the same guy when its a serious boyfriend: tall, medium build, brunette, smart, sense of humor, dorky
Discussion
Sounds like you know what you like. That’s good. You have my sincere respect.
I’ve had to learn a lot about myself & others to drill it down that deep. Maybe that’s my story: some of us are just so full of love we presume others are too … and it’s okay. Even if relationships end it doesn’t mean we are a mess. Neither are they.
Primarily I’ve learned things about myself that I can quite easily fall in love with most anyone. But the few men I truly loved from first moment… I never told them. For their own self-preservation & knowing they wouldn’t have their dreams met had we stayed together at those times in our lives. Being a seer can be difficult 😣
Never settle. It never works. I know that for sure 🥰
I know what I like, doesn't mean it works or they like me back. These days I am looking for a genuine connection that isn't built on lies. I have been burned by my type and vice versa. After many years of self reflection and a substantial amount of inner shadow work, I understand the superficiality of what I am looking for doesnt overshadowed the persons character now. Every relationship I wanted them to like me, and often I would get lost in that, then get frustrated or burned. I believe it is super important to understand yourself as a person and value yourself as well before stepping into a relationship because of looks. Looks turn ugly quick if their heart is ugly. I know what I am attracted to is a lot different what is healthy for me. I used believe that most people people loved on the same level as me, but life challenged me in my belief with how I was operating life as well as how others operated life, and not all people are good people, they are just shiny people that can put on a show. I take each relationship as a learning lesson of how I can improve, be respectful, and treat the other person with dignity. I did some majorly stupid and naive things years ago, and those were some really hard hits. I also dealt with people who distorted my idea of love. I miss the innocence of it. Yes, I know what I like. I know what I am attracted to, but on a deeper level, can this next person be my best friend?
I don't settle because I know it is not fair to either of us. If you are not 100% in it, I will be hurt but we are more likely to remain friends than someone who doesn't communicate their needs. I respect honesty a lot, because I witness a lot of deception and gas lighting. I met so many people with people but their hearts didn't shine, and why be in a relationship if your heart doesn't .... to me that is death. I rather be alone than be with someone who had settled. If I can't make you smile with your whole soul, then I don't want it. And you can't fake it with me, because I feel it. I feel when you are disconnected, and I become detached.
I know that maybe the next relationship I get into may not be the forever one, maybe it is, but understanding eachothers needs, outlooks, and desires will determine if it is something meant for the long haul.
I can look at couples and say there they match, because they each check something off that is perfectly fitted. I know the feeling I am looking for and I can't describe that. I can only express it when it happens.
Maybe I do fall in love with a sexy 6ft tall brunette and we have amazing chemistry, but I need to see his heart in person first.
Sorry for the long note.