Suicide spreads. What he did could have made it more difficult for you to avoid doing the same or making others do the same. You seem like you've had the strength to avoid being a link in the chain.

I talk about Digit all the time because I will probably not have that strength if she didn't. It's outside my control. I won't commit suicide but none of my possible methods for processing my grief are non-lethal to everyone, if none of her possible methods for processing grief have been non-lethal to her. This isn't some delusion I need "professional help" to escape, it is my real situation in a time of skyrocketing suicide rates.

Everyone should either be proving she is safe or trying to survive without my help. Instead, many people are eager to taunt me over my fear, burn crude oil, and commit suicide over my anger when they stop finding it funny and realize they have no food in the fridge because they were too busy laughing at me to listen to what I was actually saying.