Were your parents involved at all, or was there a conscious effort to minimize rules?

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Combination of lenient parents and a stubborn kid, my parents were also divorced so I was put in a trophy child position and could basically do what ever I wanted.

granted I don't know what their parenting style was behind the scenes

sorry to hear, although sounds like the ultimate leverage.

overall I had a great upbringing but yea I don't think no rules is the secret to parenting, in my opinion setting a good example is the most important thing.