i think i may have figured out one reason why it's so difficult for me to match people on dating sites...

i'm an INFP and my ideal match is an INFJ/ENFJ and they are rare.

INTJ/ENTJ could work on a conversational level, but i'd probably find her too cold and she'd find me too emotional.

swap out another letter and you get, ISFJ/ESFJ, which are common. it was my mother's type and i didn't get along with her well as an adult. emphatic and emotional but she didn't understand me because she was an S-type (sensing, sensible, practical) while i'm an N-type (iNtuitive, imaginative, thoughtful) so we constantly misunderstood each others emotional needs as adults.