no way around that. spoiler alert, nobody gets out of this alive!

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Yep and that's why I'm worried about how to set up something for my really young kids. My concern is how to not have them get rugged in the process.

I would just setup a main-net address and start funding that every month for the next 10 years. get a heat resistant steel plate and put the key (BIP-38 encrypted) on there or the seed (BIP-39 encrypted). It's the best solution imho.