Those palominos will feed you by transporting grain and bread and stuff when the trucks are out of fuel
Plus they'll stay sober to drive you home if you drink
Discussion
Have you any idea how much those useless things eat?
Driving you home drunk, though, is a major benefit I hadn't thought about.
Should we split the difference and endorse donkeys as a compromise candidate?
Yes, donkeys are excellent
However, donkeys are not as smart, more likely to take you to the wrong place if you fall asleep in the carriage
Wait my other reply was wrong, donkeys are smarter than horses
But I've heard it is also true that they mess up stuff like navigation - maybe because they're more independent minded?
I'm now imagining a Western, where in the end the horse comes up lame, and the donkey takes the drunk anti-hero to his wife's home instead of the brothel he intended to go to.
Now I just need an AI to vibe-produce it :p
Perhaps donkeys are better than horses when you factor in how bad humans ourselves are at decision making
This stayed in my head and I ended up with a whole different idea
Gunslinger has lent out his horse to a friend
Receives letter about a check he sent to his bank not getting there, says he needs to contact them to deal with it by a certain day, which is the day he's getting the letter
Only has his 2 donkeys to pull him in a cart 100 miles into the city. They've always been fine for trips around town but he's not sure if they have the speed and energy for this
After leaving town, donkeys immediately take wrong turn and stop following instructions
Gunslinger cannot abandon his donkeys and is now stuck with them on a wild adventure to Mexico
Mexican villagers think it's very funny to see this American gunslinger on such a detour
Donkeys are looking for some cactus or something they ate as baby goats in Mexico. Today is their opportunity to travel with their gunslinger as an armed guard to go eat some of that cactus again
They find the cactus pretty early in the movie but it's already way too late for the guy to get to his bank so he's lost like $20 in late fees that was a lot of money back then
The rest of the movie is the trip home
Some Mexican gangsters decide this guy will be easy to rob because he can't even control his donkeys, but the donkeys themselves foil the robbery
The border guards are mad when they get back across the border. The donkeys facilitate an escape
The main character stops and gets drunk at some point because they've had such a stressful day
He falls asleep in the cart and the donkeys take him home instead of to a brothel
*baby donkeys not baby goats
Early morning brain
Love it.
This should be a movie!
Or perhaps a computer game, where you play through as the gunslinger, the donkey, or the cactus, with different mechanics and victory conditions. Single player or multiplayer?
Single player is usually more story driven but maybe there could be a co op mode where 2 players play as the donks 🤙