can someone ask the haters if this is real bitcoin

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what is this thing called sats? i thought it was bitcoins :)

If it's off-chain it's an IOU but very close to Bitcoin if self-custodial with unilateral exit; still not Bitcoin though. If it's custodial then it's an IOU you have no control over which is opposite to the ethos behind Bitcoin.

give a ted talk

Bad OPSEC, but I'd consider a podcast if invited.

This is Eth

Send it to me and I will inspect it for authenticity

If cashapp can block the transaction (they can/have…to me personally) it’s not real bitcoin