Codex32 mitigates all three risks if used correctly. The real magic is being able to manually produce a pubkey and checksum your results with pen and paper. You can also shard the key with SSS for geographic distribution.
Important caveat: you need a digital computer to generate addresses. So it is best used as a receive only wallet. Stash the xpriv somewhere or somewheres safe and import the xpub to a watch only wallet. Once you load the xpriv into a computer to spend it's best to sweep the entire wallet. It's a perfectly offline cold storage piggy bank. Break in case of emergency.
I think this is the future direction for self custody.