Relays could advertise their current minimum PoW. Clients then pick the relays with cheapest PoW. This has the effect of distributing demand evenly across the network. Should I write a NIP? Basically this idea: https://mccormick.cx/news/entries/hashcash-auctions-for-decentralized-resource-allocation

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Great read!

I guess you'd want relays to have websocket connection slots that clients could bid for with POW, then storing events could work like powrelay or maybe there'd be some kind of time expiration component. I just wanted to collect most precious events in one place but resource allocation with pow would be awesome too.

Yep, why not both? Clients must bid for both connection slots and space in the fixed-size database. The underlying values could be computed dynamically as well, e.g. fixed database size could be based on disk size - if the relay owner adds more disk suddenly there are more slots and therefore they become cheaper.