ok - i want to onboard TOTAL noobs to Nostr: what is the quickest "follow these instructions" to get them on from 0 knowledge?
Discussion
Every client has a noob friendly "create account" button that does no such thing and instead generates and npub. There's probably enough, no?
you have to put yourself in the shoes of noobs. NONE of this will make sense... you have to literally spell it out in easy to follow steps...
Which client is going to be the friendliest then?

nostr:npub12vkcxr0luzwp8e673v29eqjhrr7p9vqq8asav85swaepclllj09sylpugg you need me to do some testing for ya? ;)
That's kind of my point. No-one with a Twitter account sat down and read the Twitter manual before creating that account, there was no need. It was easy enough to post things, and some basic reading the room and clicking around eventually got them the experience they wanted.
I don't see what's different with nostr. Fundamentally, you create and npub and go. By reading the room, you find out about relays and zaps and how npubs are transferable between clients. Typically I see many new nostr users on iPhones (the normiest of normies) think the Damus actually is nostr, at that's fine at first, but even they seem to grow out of it.
And I think all the popular clients follow the "sign up/create account" paradigm for normies, that automatically adds some public relays and gives them some people to follow.
Nostr is WAY more complicated to set up, and as i only did it once and then promptly forgot how... i don't think it's anything like "going to the play store and installing the app, The End"
Thing is everyone ON Nostr is already a geek and thinks that it's simple. Therein lies the problem. Have empathy for the grandma or the Joe on the street who just wants to click "install" on the play store...
As I said, every major client has a "create account" button and sets you up with your first relays. If you can't click a button, you probably won't remember to breathe and so won't need Nostr anyway.
So yes, you just to to the play store and install an app. It's not December 2022 anymore. Try it.
The weaknesses of Nostr are elsewhere. Ego+network effect for one. A certain amount of slow jankiness with relays. Rapid client development and the ease of running into bugs.