There are no more barriers to drive through. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the 10 car pile ups I have caused and my utter indifference toward it I have now surpassed. My buzz is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a sober world for anyone. In fact, I want my DUIs to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape, but even after admitting this, there is no catharsis. My punishment continues to elude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself. No new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This booze cruise has meant nothing.