Yeah, it's not easy. Here's a mockup I created (via a broken mkstack implementation 😂):
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One difficult decision is whether to group selections by relay with the ability to change their function (like coracle does), or to group by category with the ability to add/remove relays (like flotilla does). The many different categories of relay make it difficult for users to comprehend, which probably requires clients to help out.
All that to say, I don't really know how to solve it.