I'm calling it - kayfabe.

His polling numbers are halfway to the Earth's core, his mouth has signed foreign policy cheques his military can't cash, and the sharemarket is sickly.

Time for a high-profile relationship drama!

"We'll be just like Napoleon and Josephine!"

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Discussion

It all comes down to wrestling!

For all we know, Napoleon was straight as a highway. Macron, on the other hand... he is married to a man - his junior high crush.

Napoleon was as straight as a highway - but needed at least six lanes :p

Shorty clearly had an itch. Now who doesn't like women must go ahead and throw the first stone.