Replying to Avatar Susiebdds

In light of the information coming out about the GA school shooter I’m more fired up than ever about a situation my son is involved in at school. A boy in my son’s grade has accused my son of bullying him half a dozen times. Half the incidents have been proven false via video footage -my son was not even present 2 of the three times. Two incidents involved locker room jokes about deer testicles and “your mama so fat” between his friends that this kid wasn’t a part of but he overheard them and found it offensive. The last incident involved my son breaking up a fight with this student and an even smaller student. A week later this boy pulled a knife on my son at school and threatened to kill him because his dad is military and has trained him to kill. The threats of physical violence have continued this year and this kid has a strong infatuation with guns (presentations on guns, projects about guns and talks about guns constantly) The school’s position is “Your son is so big, there is no threat,” “Your son is literally a foot taller than this kid,” “This boy is on the spectrum and doesn’t always know what he is saying,” “I’m pretty sure your son could handle himself if he felt threatened.”

I am livid and today threatened involving law enforcement if it continues. I’d rather be wrong and considered an overzealous mom than right and students including my son get hurt.

What do you think and how would you handle this if it were your child?

Try to let go of your fear around the situation (it doesn't help you or your son). The best thing you both can do is to let go the fear & follow your intuition. My intuition has always served me in these situations except when I ignored it.

He's going to come across many more people like this in his life. I know it's hard, especially as a mother but you have to trust that things will work themselves out. Your boy is nearly a man although he'll always be a little boy in your mind. You'll always want to shield & protect him but at some point you need to accept that you can't.

I know this is a hard pill to swallow but I also know you'll consider these words. 🧡

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I hear you Brisket but that’s the thing, my intuition is that this kid is troubled and could really hurt someone. My son is the one who keeps saying, “Don’t worry mom, he wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone, he’s just really weird.” All I hear is FBI profile for school shooter.

Who are you communicating with about this at the school? My advice having previously worked in a school environment is to raise it directly with the Senior Leadership Team and/or Headteacher (not the class teacher). Producing a knife at school is not a trivial matter and should be taken seriously by them.

I'm not at all doubting your intuition. The problem with intuition is that it gets clouded when fear creeps in.

I suspect that your intuition tells you that this kid is unhinged/dangerous. This feeling combined with the shit on the news brings about a sense of fear (understandably).

All I'm saying is to try and let that fear go before taking any action from here.

Involving LE could make the whole situation worse (this is a woke world still).

You could withdraw your son from the school but that would impact your son & your relationship with him.

It's a shitty situation but there are no coincidences. This kid has entered your reality to teach you both something.

💚

It’s great advice. I’d love to just withdraw him, but you are right that there is a lot to consider. The opportunities he is receiving from his school athletics is a huge factor. Thanks for making me step back and think instead of being reactionary from the get go. It does look like the school is requiring a psychological evaluation of the student which is at least a step in addressing whether this kid could harm others or himself.