WILY WALLETS

I'm risking being an idiot here. I have been studying/reviewing/watching videos/podcasts on the Hot/Cold Wallets for months. For what I need, HODL (without needing to add more BTC to it at this point)

I know I need a Cold Wallet.

I get it and itshould be a slam dunk? But there are so many damn opinions, podcasters tied to sponsored ones, constant ads.

I struggle with the Cold wallets.

I simply want to buy a cold wallet and (essentially) lose it for 30 years.

Which is the best air gapped Cold Wallet that I never want to dink around with or have to run my own node to verify. I am a software guy, hardware is so boring to me and I have no interest learning. I just want the so called ultimate security. My seed phrase generated once in a fool-proof way. Where I know come fire, rain, or whatever, I (my family) can retrieve my Bitcoin in 2053.)

- Hardware goes obsolete

- I don't want upgrades, new features, cameras , batteries, USB ports that are long gone in 2053?

- Cheapest

- Without buying one of these, how can I airgap (using an old iPhone or a digital camera or a pencil) and use paper, to be copied, inscribed in steel (It has worked for the Coca-Cola company for years and can work for my little family?)

What did Hal Finney do, before seed phrases even? There has to be an alternative but now the Wallet business is a billion+ strong so it is FUD (Bitcoin) on top of FUD (Cold Wallets, "not your keys...".)

This is an enormous issue for Bitcoin adoption to the masses. It has to be simplified. Simple. Easy.

A lot of words for a simple question but it's a question that I think has been unaddressed. I am sure I missed the memo or podcast though so blast away but thanks in advance to anyone who can help steer me in the right direction.

Long live Bitcoin. Long live NOSTR.