I think you may have misunderstood my statement. The husband's parents, my parents, and our friends' parents are from a generation where you had a courtship (dating), got married, and had kids within a year of marriage. There was no time for them to get used to being married before they had kids, I think that is an important step for a marriage. Now that we're all grown and have kids of our own, all of our parents are miserable with each other because they realized after the fact that they don't really like being married to each other. So I chose the way I did to go slow with the marriage and starting a family as to not end up the same way.

I guess I could just shorten all this down to what's right for you isn't right for everyone and to encourage people to rush doesn't help anyone they have to decide what's right for themselves. As I said in a comment last night opinions and assholes, everybody has them 😁.