My strange opinion is that you shouldn't be any type of American, you should - at most - be Virginian, Georgian, Californian, Texan, etc. and most of the states are still to large for any sort of consensus to form about things like policy.
As soon as you stop forcing your way of life upon others and they upon you, you can view each other as neighbours rather than enemies. And as they say: "Tall fences make good neighbours".
