Downloaded Tinder this morning...

Fuck me.

Banged a Chinese chick in my kitchen at noon.

Didn't even take 3hrs after getting the app.

Now getting ready to go for dinner with a second one.

Hailey.

Actually gonna shave my balls for this one...

She's hot as fuck.

She's hot and buying me dinner...

Fuck this Tinder app kicks ass.

She's getting the Jeff dick tonight.

Why haven't I done this before?

I'm an idiot.