Dear Apple Music,

If this is supposed to be a station of all my favorite songs, where in the fresh hell do you get off playing Fall Out Boy? If I wanted to listen to white boys whine about [pick a thing] I would drive up to Cary and sit in a Starbucks without my airPods for fifteen minutes or until I started to rip my own hair out. Whichever comes first. Never again, please.

Best,

A Helpless Duck