The other question I have is this: If I add paid relays, and they come to the same feed as the free ones, how will I know which notes are coming from where? How can I appreciate the work the relay operator is doing to keep spam out of my feed, or deliver notes that are interesting to me if i can’t tell where specific notes come from ? I still haven’t figured this part out, but seems a great opportunity for simple UX to show which feed a specific note comes from. Although now that I think of it - I’m connected to 10 free relays - and when I send a note, which relays is delivering that note? All of the relays?

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NostrGram will show you the relays a note was seen on, but it takes a couple of clicks (one on the ellipsis below the note and another on the Note Info icon). In theory if you're connected to 10 free relays and they're all receiving the writes then they're all indexing your notes.