Cooks prepare the cilantro to break down the soapy molecules. They usually end up sautéing, frying or blending it in salsas/curries to break down E-2-alkenals, the aldehydes others hate so much. If you look at cuisines that frequently use cilantro (Spanish, Semitic, Mexican, Indian, Thai etc.), you'll rarely encounter it fresh in a dish. That's why they can use it without triggering mass reactions.