for sure, my body constantly auto-sabotages my intentions.. but in the end it all kinda works out ok I guess.. so I'm learning to make peace with myself when this happens and just go through it knowing it will pass and I'll be better at the end of it.

so sorry to hear that you have to live with permanent pain, that shit sucks. I lived 9 years with an incredible person that also had constant pains so I know how tough that shit is and the toll it puts on your ability to keep smiling every day.