Shit dude, okay here's the plan: Nostr users like me are incredibly mentally vulnerable and we will do practically anything for the possibility of obtaining more Bitcoin. Find a Nostr user and tell them that you will pay them 7 Satoshis to write the essay for you. In real people money, that's like 1 cent, but Nostr users like me have an irrational conviction that every single Satoshi is going to be worth a fortune in the far future.