this is why i'm so mad about people not understanding the point of nip-42 and it's centrally about the fucking DM privacy!!!!
plaintext attacks are not a real threat
not being able to read your own messages is a real threat to usability
verifying that relays are properly gating access to DMs is easy and cheap and is easy to stop any attempts to game this and appear that you are not giving them away
yes, relays have privilege to see them of course, but this is far better than opening up the whole world to see it
nip-44 is not solving any real problems for DMs compared to having auth