It turns out that trying to run a VPN on a horribly intermittent mobile connection only makes it worse by blocking whatever little traffic you may have been able to get through without trying to reestablish the tunnel. ðŸ«
Discussion
VPN protocols introduce a hefty overhead that is often overlooked.
A workaround is to use a proxy server (socks5, http) that you control and have _that_ be the VPN.
Gluetun can do that - it saves some of the overhead, but isn't as encapsulated, mind you.
Still, gets the job done. Carriers only see one constant connection, and that's it.
fly.io offers a free VM-thing - this should have ample resources to run this =)
It requires a bit of a pipe and you're dealing with a coffee stirrer.