Nationalism conflates rulers with the ruled. By framing wars as struggles of the "people" rather than the state’s elite, governments manipulate loyalty to justify aggression, sacrifice, and exploitation.

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Fact. It's the religious believe the gov is working for you and the people and in the name of what "we" want. Turns out there is no "we", but rather a large group of individuals. Waking up from nationalistic believes can happen as soon as "your country" decides to turn against you, and you find out the hard way that you were not part of the elite's club or its strategy.

Nationalism can be the chosen religion of a weak individual seeking help from a bully. And the bully can appear to help, strengthening your believes, until that moment it turns out it was never your friend nor intended to be.

This 1000% percent. Well said and all too true…

Why after thousands of years do we refuse to see it?

Precisely