Okay, I understand. I give up. They are right. Keeping all the money for yourself just isn't right. It needs to be redistributed.

I give in.

I'll share my Bitcoin as evenly as possible.

256 of the people that zap this note, will each get one out of the 256 bits that make up my private key. All you need is to assemble it, and you can sweep the wallet.

Go ahead, I'm waiting.