You want truth? I am stuck, because I do no longer believe most people deserve to benefit from anything I have done in the past and (would) want to do in the future. I wanted to help make things better. I have helped and supported many people in the past. They have all shown me they don't give a shit. They prefer harassment and abuse.

The future I want, they don't deserve.

*If*, which means this is a hypothetical statement, I die tomorrow, I contribute more to the future they *deserve* than when I do good, as I would want to do.