There is no one book for this. Otherwise, we will not come here on Earth to learn. Every actions or situations are learnable. Regardless how people view it, the question is, what are you learning from it? Imagine if we ought to grow every time, perhaps we will be in much better place. But I am also aware growth to someone is different. Putting others the same standards as us will always create struggle. Maybe and only maybe, if we can learn to understand and be more compassionate, only then we can work together. In order to do this, one has to be kind to one's self before they can do that to other. I most often see that kindness to one's self is the most difficult part; I have seen it in my practice and I was guilty of it too. This is of course my ideal world.