The only essential thing to know about vim is how to exit it without saving :)

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Try this random sequence

*+$+=+@=&@!!*%@&#!#@

+#&%=$&@===+&!=$%!&@

%==#&=%&&$!&$+#=&@!#

%*$$!!+&%=!*=$$+#!=*

!&%++$!#+&&+=%%=@*@@

#$=@@!&@*=%*#%$!!=!#

&!$+#++*!$!!**%@+@+$

==@=+%+%%==!#*+=%%!%

=@#**=&=++%$!$&*+!+*

#%!!=++$%=#%&%@&@%=%

&#@$#$+!@#=@@*+=!#$=

!!#&$**=@%*+&@!@#&!%

&+@$$=&**%&!&@&@&#=!

@&=!*!%=#$%=!!&@@*#%

!@@&=*=%++##+%$*@%%@

@+%*%#@@=!=#%===!=!%

@!&@#=$&$@=&@=#@++&&

=!$=%#*%#*$*@+*#&%&!

+*+#@&+=&*&!$*=%*@$+

=+=&=+@+#&=@=*#%$$$$

ESC:q!

F*ck I'm officially old.

ZQ