Do you know if most/all clients now use NIP 17 ? Are others still able to see who you DM even if they can’t see the contents? Thanks!

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If Alice sends Bob a NIP-17 DM, others will only see that Bob received a DM from a random account; they won’t see that it was sent by Alice.

That's one data point too much if you ask me.

Nobody should know that Bob just got a message.