I think it must be said, for the sake of clarity, that in the legally binding position some parties in this entirely convoluted mess were and are, it's not a matter of escalating blame to the one with the most perceived power. throughout much of this bullshit, that "power" has been constrained by these same forces which plot for my demise. it's a terrible position to be in when you have an entire political party threatening to condemn and kill people you care about, so you can't exactly be flagrant about your support for their opposition. at least not in my position.

the fact is that I do qualify as a Jew in the "Jewish Community" and their greatest hope is for my submission to the colloquial identity pamphlet and not necessarily my death. it does feel like being pulled in all directions, like being ideologically drawn and quartered.

at some point, it's almost impossible to know who to trust. I suppose I don't even trust my own family in that they go through their own phases of abject denial and usually take it out on me. then there are those women who see nothing but competition and they'll literally do anything to make sure I end up forgotten and abandoned. their greatest refrain is, "when are you going to get a real job," which is ironic because most of their jobs can be summed up as whoring their way to fame.

it's a very ugly situation to be in, and I don't think most "cancelled" people go through it like this because their main schtick is politics and not music. my main schtick is music and I think the impetus is really to stop a woman like me from being influential through it. these celebrities, influencers, and politicians might be, in some way, just like us, but they sure as fuck don't want us to be like them.

once you uncover the grift, it makes perfect sense as to why: they're all thieves.