I’m not exactly sure, but I think it has something to do with AUTH. You need to go in to Settings -> App Settings and enable β€œAuthenticate with relays” and save.

You don’t need to AUTH for nostr.wine unless you’re requesting DMs but it’s possible when it gets an AUTH prompt it stops using that relay unless that setting is turned on. Perhaps nostr:npub1jlrs53pkdfjnts29kveljul2sm0actt6n8dxrrzqcersttvcuv3qdjynqn can clarify for us.

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A setting in Nostur allowed me to turn on AUTH for my paid relays and we are back in business, connecting just fine now.

No other client I am using had that setting, from what I could tell (Amethyst, Coracle)