Shut some off.. some of those free ones suck to much spam..

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i'm not having good reachability on the network. i suspect it's because i'm not on many paid relays.

That has nothing to do with it, I don’t use any except to read content. I recommend grabbing follows from mutuals and looking at global, start interacting with ppl, you’ll get follows.

it's not about interactions, i know that takes time. what i mean is that when i check with technical tools to see where the posts get relayed, they hardly get relayed anywhere.

What app are you using?

multiple, because they all seem a little inconsistent about what they show me on my timelines. on desktop mostly iris.to but checking things in nostrgram.co from time to time, and on mobile it's Damus.