⚡️💬 POW - Flash has just published its 9000th note in 164 days.

And I must confess: in my eyes, it's a failure.

For me, Nostr is not a secondary network, nor a protocol to be "tested". It's the network I've staked everything on. And maybe it's precisely because I believed in it so strongly... that I expected too much.

This feeling has been with me for 2 or 3 weeks. I've kept it to myself. But when you add up the time invested and the payoff... the result is hard to ignore.

Am I selling the present moment for an uncertain future? I've had this feeling for a few days now, and it's making me sincerely anxious. I tell myself that I've spent so much time dreaming of a future where I'll be living from Nostr, that I've forgotten to live in the present.

Despite the 164 days I've given up and 163 nights I've sacrificed, this dream is still far away, very far away indeed. As they say, it's when you start learning about a subject that you realize you're swimming in an ocean of ignorance.

That's a bit like what I experienced with Nostr, at the beginning I believed in it like hell, I threw myself into it with determination and stars in my eyes, the first few months went by super fast, I received 100 sats and exploded with joy, I thought that if I increased my work exponentially it would be the same for my income, but that's not the right calculation. Between theory and practice there's an unknown variable that can't be calculated.

Far be it from me to pity the readers, never. It's my failure, not yours. On the contrary, most of you have pushed me to push my limits, and that's quite a feat. I achieved the biggest speed run and the first speed run in the history of Nostr. Without you, I'd never have succeeded.

Now if I change my perspective and tell myself that the goal is not my personal success but the improvement of the Nostr protocol. So it's a success, I've documented my journey from the start and shared all my statistics with you. If anyone wants to embark on the adventure of making a living from Nostr, they can draw inspiration from my account and retrieve all the information they need. I encourage them to do so.

I think the things that have contributed to the success of my account are the concern for a job well done, both in form and content. Each publication is reworked, meticulously checked and, for those with an eye for detail, I've even established an artistic direction so that every time you come across a flash note you'll recognize it among 1000.

To sum up, from a personal point of view it's a failure, but from a collective point of view it's a success. The adventure isn't over yet, I've promised to write 10,000 notes, and words are very important to me. Words are worth a man or a man is worth nothing.

Maybe I'll go beyond that, maybe at 10,000 I'll take a break, maybe I'll stop and think about how to improve my life now, I don't know.

Some will be delighted, others will be disgusted. Either way, I wish only the best for both parties. As you know, I have nothing but love to offer.

Anyway, enough about me, let's get to the numbers: 164 days 9,000 notes 6,306 replies 1,580,588 satoshi received.

➤ 9000 / 164 = 54.878 notes per day

➤ 54.878 / 24 = 2.287 notes per hour

➤ 9000 + 6303 = 15.303 traces of activity

➤ 15303 / 164 = 93.311 activity traces per day

➤ 93.311 / 24 = 3.888 activity traces per hour

➤ 1580588 / 9000 = 175.621 sats per publication

➤ 54 * 175 = 9,450 sats per day

➤ 9000 * 8 = 72,000 working hours

➤ 9450 / 8 = 1,181.25 sats per hour

About €0.90 per hour worked for a btc at $105,000 as I speak. And I'm a little uncomfortable with the fact that one person has contributed almost half of my income, without him I'd be at €0.40 an hour, maybe even less...

I put Nostr ahead of my work, ahead of my sleep, ahead of my family and friends, that's just me, I'm like that when I get into something it's all or nothing. I hate doing things by halves.

I'm proud of how far I've come, I'm proud to know you, I'm proud to have made my place among the internet elite. Thank you all, I'm going back to work.

(Ps: I've also improved my English a lot thanks to you.)