Alexander the Grate

I accidentally took my cats meds this morning..

Don't ask meow

Yesterday I paid a stranger to knock me unconscious, shove a foreign object up my ass and film the whole thing.

Or as my doctor calls it: a colonoscopy.

good or bad.

Here are 5 tips: 🧵

#bitcoin

You thought other puns were bad?

Just wait until you sea mine

🚨 JUST IN: iPhone 15 rumored to be able to make phone calls

I’ll admit it, I have a tremendous sex drive.

My girlfriend lives 40 miles away.