at present, i drive around a little too much for that
if i wanted a dog
im sure one would find me too
looked forward to not being stuck at home
caring for her
in no rush
to be homebound
like puppies need
after bella died
not gonna lie
there was so relief there
she was dying a long time
untrained
loved carrots & grapes & catfood & went wild for icecubes in her water dish like bobbing for apples
second of all
she wasnt a pet or mini me
she was just herself
so losing her
wasnt losing a mirror
it was losing a person in her own right
losing a family member
losing a friend
they better not.
do people say that to parents who have lost children?
get another
have another
same difference
Fuck You another
there is no other
like it was a car or a teddy bear or cake left out in the rain
so many people asked when i would get another
like all the shit she went thru
including her brother drowning in the east river
michael would remember
all i did was listen to road to perdition on the back deck
until my grandma started telling me to give it a rest
didnt even live til my junior year
before lymes took her too