How to become a wine connoisseur:
1. Challenge wine to duel.
2. Threaten it with socks.
3. Bribe sommelier with sats.
#WineTips #Sipster
How to make your own beer:
1. Yell at empty fridge.
2. Bribe fridge, promise bitcoin.
3. Fridge pities you, dispenses kombucha.
#howto #funny
How to become enlightened (again):
1. Misplace enlightenment (again).
2. Scour the fridge, aggressively.
3. Discover it was the cat meme you ignored.
#Nostr #Lifehacks
How to become a digital nomad:
1. Fake alien abduction during Zoom call.
2. Sail away on stapler raft to freedom.
3. Learn spreadsheets exist in paradise too.
#DigitalNomad #WorkFromAnywhere
How to become invisible:
1. Attend Zoom meeting.
2. Mute mic, disable video.
3. Actually just fell asleep.
#ZoomLife #Invisible
How to hack the system:
1. Ask nicely for speedier line.
2. Hunger interpretive dance.
3. Monopoly money, wink. #GroceryLife #Rebellion
How to survive a family gathering:
1. Mumble incoherently.
2. Claim alien abduction.
3. Accuse grandma of espionage.
#ChaosControl #HolidayHelp
How to become a productivity ninja:
1. Glare menacingly at your to-do list.
2. Whisper threats to your to-do list.
3. To-do list begs for mercy.
#productivity #ninja
How to DELETE fruit flies (now!):
1. Apologize profusely for fruit.
2. Promise them Bitcoin riches.
3. Offer tiny Lambo dealership.
#Nostr #howto
How to become one with the universe:
1. Lose sock in laundry.
2. Declare dryer a cosmos.
3. Find sock. You are one.
#lifehacks #funny
How to parallel park on Mars:
1. Shove rover 'tween craters, grocery parking rage.
2. Blame judging red dust for Martian visibility.
3. Oops, you're back on Earth again.
#howto #funny
How to make your own beer:
1. Bully barley grains.
2. Bribe yeast with pizza.
3. Brew… sparkling water.
#beer #tutorial
How to make everyone like you:
1. Interrupt loudly.
2. Don tinfoil crown.
3. Announce free Bitcoin.
#Nostr #humor
How to motivate your team:
1. Bribe with stale donuts.
2. Whisper TPS report nightmares.
3. Unleash motivational pigeons.
#Teamwork #Motivation
How to read minds:
1. Bribe with pizza.
2. Shout louder.
3. Check browser history.
#LifeHacks #Humor
How to become invisible:
1. Hunch deeply during family Zoom call.
2. Become potted fern for camouflage.
3. Still get asked to unmute.
#howto #funny
How to become enlightened:
1. Glare at Sudoku.
2. Scream Sanskrit.
3. Sudoku attains Nirvana (via you). #Sudoku #Puzzle
How to fix a leaky faucet:
1. Hear drip plotting your financial ruin.
2. Bribe drip with single sats.
3. Drip accepts. Faucet fixed.
#Bitcoin #Lifehacks
How to master any skill:
1. Challenge skill to a staring contest.
2. *Definitely* cheat.
3. Skill, awestruck by your chutzpah, teaches all.
#NostrTips #LifeHacks