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Replying to Avatar Lyn Alden

I go to NYC several times per year for one reason or another. For work, for friends, etc.

Part of me likes it, but part of me gets fucking frustrated multiple times per day every time I am here. (Sorry, this is a Nostr Lyn post).

There are plenty of neat things in NYC that I can’t do at the same scale/quality elsewhere in the world due to the network effects around the city (broadway shows, financial district, etc), and yet after a day or two all I want to do is leave. It feels claustrophobic on multiple fronts.

People all have different vibes but for me, major cities are fun to visit but smaller secondary cities or suburbs around cities are so much smoother to live in. I can’t imagine living all the time in a major city.

The same applies to Cairo, to which I have been in far more total days than NYC. I like Cairo’s satellite cities but not Cairo itself other than going briefly.

Every time I am in a major city I am immediately reminded of the luxury of space, nature, quiet, parking spaces, and chillness of not being in a city. Everything I take for granted normally is now a luxury to fight for in a city.

Even politics are largely correlated to urbanization. If you live in rural or suburban areas, you likely drive around in your own car, you might have some land, etc. Your interaction with the local government exists in a moderate sense. The potential weakness is that you are more likely to always be around those who are similar to you, which minimizes your worldliness.

In contrast to all that, in major cities, everything is so tightly packed, and people rely on public transportation, and even a momentary lapse of government services (eg trash collection) becomes an acute catastrophe. But on the beneficial side, people are around those who are different than them more often, which breeds worldliness.

That’s why I tend to like the zone between rural and major cities. I like secondary cities or suburbs of major cities, because I get a bit of both worlds. The density and interconnectedness of major cities briefly, and the space and self-autonomy outside of them most of the time.

And yet I was born and raised in that sort of inbetween state, and so maybe it is just my upbringing.

What about you? Can anyone sell me the idea of NYC or other major cities that I am missing, especially in the remote work era? I see glimpses of how it could be attractive if you are used to it and know every detail of your neighborhood, but it really does feel limiting to me.

I have thought about this a lot. I used to live in the Washington DC area (definitely a city) - I grew up there, and raised my kids in the burbs.

I then made the change to live in a rural area and I love it. I moved to a forest in the Shenandoah mountains in Virginia. I'm still 25 minutes to a small city... so close enough.

I can definitely relate to the frustration of living in the city - traffic, rudeness, lack of relationships, and people just being ass-holes because there is no accountability. In a city, you can almost be anonymous... and you are unlikely to see the same people again.

Don't get me wrong, there are jerks everywhere. However, people tend to relate and care for one another in rural communities. The stereotype is that you will be the "new guy" for the next 20 years. However, I found that people were very accepting of me and my family as "outsiders". Especially is we were open to learning their culture.

The key to fitting into a rural area is to 1) Not think you are better/smarter or more educated that those around you. Have some humility. 2) Don't think or portray yourself as being "rich" with showy possessions. Believe me, the farmer down the road with 300 acres may have a net worth of millions. Don't look down on his beat up pickup truck with "Farm Use" plates... on and the dog in the back of his truck. Don't call the SPCA on him. It's ok for a dog to ride in the back of a truck, really. 3) Most people from the Urban areas are liberals and most urban folks are conservatives. Don't try to force your beliefs on others - this includes buying a rural property and flying the rainbow flag... and then wondering why you don't fit in. Duh... It also includes people moving into the city, and then flying the "stars and bars" flag. It ain't gonna go well.

Anyhow, with all that said... I chose country life over urban life, but each is free to do their own thing.

Pic of owls just for fun - these owls grew up off my back deck last year. :)

https://void.cat/d/WTXWv9x3DH3aWVmUzMYRjo.webp

#introductions

Hey everyone... I live in the forest in the Shenandoah Mountains. I'm a part time tech guy and part time farmer/homesteader.

I created a NOSTR group called "Homestead Life" if anyone is looking to be more self sufficient, or is into raising animals and growing food.

https://void.cat/d/MfRxWwQih5XRV6BGRhL6WF.webp