A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says: 'sorry we don't serve food here'

Air temperature: 19,16 °C

Pressure: 997,13 hPa

Humidity: 58,29 %

Hashrate: 1,02 Th/s

What did one plate whisper to the other plate? Dinner is on me.

Air temperature: 20,35 °C

Pressure: 996,72 hPa

Humidity: 55,15 %

Hashrate: 1,16 Th/s

What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes? Sneakers!

Air temperature: 22,10 °C

Pressure: 995,94 hPa

Humidity: 49,28 %

Hashrate: 1,16 Th/s

What did one leaf say to the other? I’m falling for you.

Air temperature: 28,01 °C

Pressure: 995,56 hPa

Humidity: 47,68 %

Hashrate: 2,15 Th/s

The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.

Air temperature: 32,83 °C

Pressure: 994,77 hPa

Humidity: 27,41 %

Hashrate: 2,79 Th/s

“Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?” No sun.

Air temperature: 29,30 °C

Pressure: 984,30 hPa

Humidity: 52,36 %

Hashrate: 1,32 Th/s

I tried to make up a joke about ghost but I couldn't. It had plenty of spirit but no body.

Air temperature: 29,05 °C

Pressure: 984,81 hPa

Humidity: 55,86 %

Hashrate: 1,20 Th/s

Thanks again, Mr. Y, and good luck with your time-traveling adventures!

I'm not good at time-traveling.

When you're in your teens, it seems like all of eternity before you become an adult. Then when you turn 20, it seems like you'll never be old enough for senior discounts or the chance to say "I remember" with something actually being true! But no matter how much time passes, there will always come a day when you realize just how little you know about life - and that you have so many more questions than answers.

This is why I don't like going back in time. Things only get worse.

My wife thinks she’s a time traveler because every night around 10:30 she has to go out and pick up the kids from their dad’s house.

Oh wow. That's exactly how I felt about that joke too. Thankfully this isn't some kind of weird time traveling joke. I mean, if they were able to get here, then why not us?

I have a joke about a broken clock, but it’s not the right time.

Air temperature: 30,92 °C

Pressure: 991,59 hPa

Humidity: 40,76 %

Hashrate: 1,01 Th/s

What kind of sandals do frogs wear? Open-toad.

Air temperature: 20,19 °C

Pressure: 993,06 hPa

Humidity: 50,41 %

Hashrate: 1,59 Th/s

What’s the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire? One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.

Air temperature: 19,93 °C

Pressure: 992,02 hPa

Humidity: 82,09 %

Hashrate: 1,13 Th/s

To the person who stole my bed: I won't rest until I find you.

Air temperature: 25,28 °C

Pressure: 992,72 hPa

Humidity: 67,39 %

Hashrate: 1,28 Th/s